Column 1

Boozed up burglar
A CCTV footage caught a 29-year-old man in Perth, Australia breaking into a liquor shop. Like a kid in a lolly shop, the thirsty bandit quickly helped himself to his favourite beverages. Soon staying upright was a challenge as the drunk burglar struggled to find a way out. He gave up and instead lay on a pool table until police arrived at the scene. Dubbed Perth’s dumbest criminal he is expected to be slapped with a hefty bill.
Cold weather
NCD residents wrap yourselves in for more cold nights ahead. The weather man advised that the cold weather conditions experienced at the moment was due to winter in Australia which is at its peak.
Sleepless nights
A first-time father told his female colleagues in the newsroom that he has been awake for 20 hours since his wife gave birth. The response he got from the ladies was; “Get used to it. There’s more sleepless nights to come.”
PMV service
Despite warnings from authorities, PMV buses in the nation’s capital continue to over-charge passengers, and don’t bother to complete their routes. Over to you NCD governor.
Smokey buses
The PMV association earlier this year announced that there was a law that public transport was a smoke-free area and that included the PMV buses, and taxis. Despite this good law, there many people smoking on PMVs, including the bus driver, and his crew members.
No NID
A lady submitted her NID card application two years ago and was waiting for the card. This week she was advised to submit her details again. The explanation she got from the NID office was; “Sorry the officer in charge of your information did not do his job.”
Top quote
“Folks are usually about as happy as they make their minds up to be.” Late US President Abraham Lincoln.