Column 1

Reversed position
Funny that some people who love to spend more time at home rather than at work are now complaining after the Government says they have to.
Funeral service
Husband tells wife that when he dies, he wants the funeral service held in a small church. When she asks why, he explains there’s a 90 per cent chance the church will “look” full.
Zip mask
A man improvises using his old pants for a face mask. The zip comes in handy when it’s time for a drink or cigarette. Clever.
Same name
A reporter went red in the face when a female colleague announced within everyone’s earshot that he will be leaving with her after the media conference. Later, she explained to a stunned room that she meant her taxi driver (who had the same name as the male colleague).
Fake news
Reporters were told last Friday that Prime Minister James Marape did not want any more live telecasting of the daily media briefings. He apparently was not aware of it because he turned up and was surprised to hear the news.
Long hair
This is what happens when you stay for too long at home because of the lockdown.
Thought for today
To be kind is more important than to be right. Many times what people need is not a brilliant mind that speaks but a special heart that listens.
Top quote
“There is absolutely no excuse to use Covid-19 to quash criticism of the Government by the media.” – Daniel Bastard, the head of the Asia-Pacific Desk at Reporters Without Borders (RSF).