If you feel you can’t cope, ask for help

None of us are super-humans. We all sometimes get tired or weighed down by how we feel or when things go wrong.
If things are getting too much for you and you feel you can’t cope, ask for professional help.
Your family or friends may be able to offer practical help or a listening ear. Mental Health Services is also  there to help you. As a guide, you could:
l    Join a support group to help you make changes to your life; 
l    Find a counsellor to help you deal with your feelings or make a fresh start; and
l    Call at the Mental Health Services for professional advice.
Your local doctor may be able to refer you to a counsellor. You should consider getting help from your doctor if difficult feelings are:
l    Stopping you getting on with life;
l    Having a big impact on the people you live or work with; and
l    Affecting your mood over several weeks.
Over a third of visits to doctors are about mental health. Your doctor may suggest ways you or your family can help you. Or they may refer you to a specialist mental health worker.
Do something that you’re good at
What do you enjoy doing? What activities can you lose yourself in?
What did you love doing in the past? Enjoying yourself helps beat stress.
Doing an activity you enjoy probably means you’re good at it and achieving something that boosts your self-worth. Concentrating on a hobby like gardening or the crossword can help you forget your worries for a while and change your mood.
“Learning the guitar really gets you to concentrate on getting it right so there’s no room in your head for worries.”
It can be good to have an interest where you’re not seen as someone’s mum or dad, partner or employee.
You’re just you tasol. An hour of sketching lets you express yourself creatively.
A morning on the football pitch gets you active and gives you the chance to meet new people.
Cultivate the culture to care for others
“Friends help each other whenever we can, so simply this is a two-way road and supporting them uplifts me.”
Caring for others is often an important part of keeping up relationships with people close to you.
It can even bring you closer together. Why not share your skills more widely by taking part in a local charity?
Helping out can make us feel needed and valued and that boosts our self-esteem.
It helps us see the world from another angle. That can help to put our own problems in point of view. Caring for a pet can improve your wellbeing too.
The bond between you and your pet can be as strong as between people. Looking after a pet can bring structure to your day and act as a link to other people.
Lots of people make friends by chatting over their pets.
Always remember that when you are ready to throw up your hands in frustration that you most need to hang in there even more.
As it is often quoted that life is “never dull, never boring”. Stay tuned to the rhythm of your body, enjoying the fragile ‘moments of truth’. Importantly have confidence in yourselves and keep life simple.

Please write to my team if you have queries on:
Dr Uma Ambi
Principal adviser
Mental Health Services
C/o Kundu 2-Beautiful Mind,
PO Box 8, Boroko, NCD