Keeping things in perspective

By STEVEN WINDUO
ONE of the first things I started working on is a personal budget. I have not been a budget person or someone who is good with managing my money. I thought I should take control of my poor financial management system and do something about it.
Many of us go through life without taking control of our lives. We ignore our own problems and focus on other people’s problems. We are quick to blame others for the woes we experience in life. We shift the focus away from ourselves.
Acknowledging we make mistakes in life is a start. Taking small actions to manage the problem is a critical step in taking ownership of the mistakes we made in the past. Many of us think the right time will come for us to address the problem instead of starting now by taking one small step in moving forward.
I want to make this year an eventful year. I have several personal and professional projects to undertake this year. I have several books to publish and have to attend two writer’s events scheduled for 2017. This means I have to schedule all these events in a year’s calendar.
I also recognize that I need to acknowledge my mistakes in the past in order for me to get ahead. It is important to learn from our mistakes and what we could have done differently to get the desirable results.
A book that I have not had the chance to read since I bought it is The Naked CEO: The truth you need to build a big life (2015) by Alex Malley. Chapter 3 reveals that our mistakes often make us smarter and stronger: “When you’re faced with an undesirable outcome that you’re responsible for, make it known that you have accepted the responsibility. Don’t shy away from it or pretend you were not to blame. Acknowledging it will immediately make you stronger.”
To move on we need to learn from our past mistakes. “Mistakes also make you smarter,” writes Malley. “You will learn from them, and you will find out how to accept and move on from them. Eating “humble pie” once in a while does not always have to taste bad.”
Every year before I embark on activities planned for the year I always look back to see where I might have made a mistake or two. By doing so I begin to see what I can do differently or find other approaches to get better results. For example, last year I have ignored the daily habit of writing in my private journal. As a result I have not been very organized in the way I did things. The results I got were not up to the level I expected. I decided to visit Theodist last week and spent K54 for new journals to correct the mistake.
I need to do more. Malley’s words are encouraging: “Every time you make a mistake, you will discover how resilient you are. You will learn more about your character and how well, or how badly, you cope when you don’t perform at your expectation. Talking to your boss or colleagues about complex and unpleasant issues are daily undertakings for a leader, so facing your mistakes and learning how to communicate to others is essential for your professional development.”
Some of the tips Malley offers in The Naked CEO are: “Be honest and own it: you have made a mistake—now what? The best way to start turning it into a positive is to admit you have made a mistake. When you start blaming other people, you distance yourself from any possible lesson.”
Next reflect on what went wrong: “Take a few minutes to work out what happened. Once you have got you head around it, think about what you could do differently if you found yourself in the same situation in the future.”
Another time tested tip: “Look at the glass as half full. You’ll achieve little from thinking about mistakes as failures rather than opportunities to learn and grow as a person. In fact people are more likely to learn from their mistakes than their successes. With each mistake you make, you’re able to learn a lot more about yourself, other people and practical processes that will help you in the future.”
The Naked CEO cautions us to avoid unnecessary mistakes: “If you make a mistake because you didn’t understand what was required of you at the outset, I would classify this as an avoidable or unnecessary mistake. Always ask questions so you understand the task or directive before embarking on it.”
Finding solutions should be the goal: “Taking a moment to solve the problem, or at least making an effort to do so, will garner you a lot more respect from your managers and colleagues. Think through the issue rationally and objectively. Ask yourself: What caused the mistake? Who will need to be made aware of it? And what is a potential solution?”
Staying calm and controlled is the key to managing complex situations: “Letting stress and fear take control can be easy when something goes wrong, but being guided by these emotions will probably just dig you a deeper hole. So when you make a mistake, remain calm and composed, and avoid making compulsive decisions to remedy the situation.”
Keeping things in perspective is a rule of the thumb: “Think about some of the mistakes you have made in your life already. Consider what you learnt from the experience and how your emotions shifted over time.”
Accepting the behavior of others is difficult but an important ingredient to managing a complex situation effectively: “Being judgmental is one of the worst traits of humanity. When someone else make a mistake, which may or may not affect you, remember that these things can happen to anyone, and it will likely be your turn one day.”
Finally, move on when the time is right: “The world lives in the moment and aims for the future.”