Column 1 – The National

Big swallow
Master Four enjoying a swim with family at Ela Beach accidently swallowed sea water. He ran screaming to his mother crying: “Mum, I drank the Ela Beach.”
Cheeky post
An All Blacks fan posted this: “Are you an Australian Wallabies fan? Are you suffering from depression? Then call the NZ Rugby Union toll free line 0800 10 10, that’s zero eight hundred won nothing won nothing!”
Too soft
Former England captain and NRL star James Graham says some of the sin-binning for high tackles being meted out today are making rugby league look more like rugby union. Girlie, girlie stuff!
Polygamy advice
An advice in Parliament this week by a government minister to fellow MPs about the many adverse effects of polygamy did no raise any eyebrows. Strange.
Don’t lie
Always keep in mind that African proverb: A lie has many variations, the truth none.
Public holiday
From a reader: Not complaining about the public holiday next week but the day is in the middle of the week. Public holidays are best on Monday and Friday. He hopes someone is listening.
No respect
A mother walked into a full bus and after not finding a seat, stood near the doorway hanging on for dear life. Not one man stood to offer her his seat. Really sad.
Thought for today
Two golden rules of marriage: 1) A woman is always right. 2) If you think she is wrong, slap yourself, and read rule one again.
Top quote
“It is a brutal killing arising from a belief in sorcery. Such beliefs, in my view, are based on a twisted manufacture of blame on sorcery over an earlier death, which is totally amiss of the naked eye.” – Justice Lawrence Kangwia.